Sooo what started off as an innocent trip to the store with kiddo #2, ended in one of THE most awkward ~ifeelsobadforyou~ moments of my life. I am pretty used to being the one that things happen to and letting it roll off and laughing about it.. Now I know what everyone else around me feels when they observe the not so normal shenanigans that seem to follow me . Odd to be on the other end of it .
In this house, with 4 girls, we are pretty into hair trends and fashion . Someone is ALWAYS switching things up with their hair ,compliments of my favorite beauty school drop out, moi ! I do save us a lot of money by doing it at home so thats the plus side. So for our latest adventure in hair evolution , kiddo #2 and I head to the store to get supplies.
I pick out our goodies, make small talk with the girls who work there who pretty much know me by now as this is a regular stop for me . We head up to the register to pay and are next in line. The woman in front of us pays and leaves. I step up to the register, place my goods on the counter and the girl at the register just freezes. She stops dead in her tracks and is just staring at me . I look at my daughter like oooookkkk? do you see this weirdness too? Then it hits me. Like literally punches me in my face so hard my eyes start to tear. The chick farted. We didn't hear it , there was no advanced warning . I just kept staring at my daughter as to not make eye contact with the deer in headlights girl behind counter that was clearly mortified and literally frozen. I don't know if she was frozen because she was so embarrassed or she was scared to assassinate us again if she moved. By this time my daughter is literally in tears and her head was swinging around like the exorcist looking for fresh air out of desperation as she was trying not to be rude and run the hell out of there. DESPERATE. The girl behind counter says Ill be right back .She makes a mad dash to the back with my bag, mind you. So I couldn't leave. My daughter and I are so confused and scared to breath and almost passing out . 2-3 minutes go buy, The poor girl comes running back and hands me back my bag . Says~ Here . Take it . I paid and we left. I look in the bag and that poor stinky little soul put every free sample she could find in that back room and shoved it in there! I honestly felt so bad for her. Y'all, I would have died if that was me. I would of FLAT.OUT.DIED. I am the most private farter on the planet and If I had to be face to face with 2 people that I literally almost tear gassed/poisoned , I would not be able to cope and would probably move and change my name. Yes I know everyone does it , yes I know its natural, and Yes I would have ran out the back door if I was that chick and found a new job. I can't go back in there now. I don't know what I am going to do when i need hair stuff! I can't face her . You know she is never going to forget my face. And I think it'll be worse if i try to console her. Like what do you say ? Im sorry you almost gassed us to death and then left us to live in it for 3 minutes , everyone does it ? I was very thankful for the free hair products though. This girl will never turn down free hair stuff.
xoxo
In this house, with 4 girls, we are pretty into hair trends and fashion . Someone is ALWAYS switching things up with their hair ,compliments of my favorite beauty school drop out, moi ! I do save us a lot of money by doing it at home so thats the plus side. So for our latest adventure in hair evolution , kiddo #2 and I head to the store to get supplies.
I pick out our goodies, make small talk with the girls who work there who pretty much know me by now as this is a regular stop for me . We head up to the register to pay and are next in line. The woman in front of us pays and leaves. I step up to the register, place my goods on the counter and the girl at the register just freezes. She stops dead in her tracks and is just staring at me . I look at my daughter like oooookkkk? do you see this weirdness too? Then it hits me. Like literally punches me in my face so hard my eyes start to tear. The chick farted. We didn't hear it , there was no advanced warning . I just kept staring at my daughter as to not make eye contact with the deer in headlights girl behind counter that was clearly mortified and literally frozen. I don't know if she was frozen because she was so embarrassed or she was scared to assassinate us again if she moved. By this time my daughter is literally in tears and her head was swinging around like the exorcist looking for fresh air out of desperation as she was trying not to be rude and run the hell out of there. DESPERATE. The girl behind counter says Ill be right back .She makes a mad dash to the back with my bag, mind you. So I couldn't leave. My daughter and I are so confused and scared to breath and almost passing out . 2-3 minutes go buy, The poor girl comes running back and hands me back my bag . Says~ Here . Take it . I paid and we left. I look in the bag and that poor stinky little soul put every free sample she could find in that back room and shoved it in there! I honestly felt so bad for her. Y'all, I would have died if that was me. I would of FLAT.OUT.DIED. I am the most private farter on the planet and If I had to be face to face with 2 people that I literally almost tear gassed/poisoned , I would not be able to cope and would probably move and change my name. Yes I know everyone does it , yes I know its natural, and Yes I would have ran out the back door if I was that chick and found a new job. I can't go back in there now. I don't know what I am going to do when i need hair stuff! I can't face her . You know she is never going to forget my face. And I think it'll be worse if i try to console her. Like what do you say ? Im sorry you almost gassed us to death and then left us to live in it for 3 minutes , everyone does it ? I was very thankful for the free hair products though. This girl will never turn down free hair stuff.
xoxo
This is the funniest thing I've read in a very long time. Dying over here. ��
ReplyDeleteThanks Friend ! xoxo
DeleteToo funny...giggling here!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sue ! Please share my link! xoxo
DeleteHilarious! Time will pass just like the smell! Give her another chance! I generally have to apologize or hid my embarrassment from my oldest's gas explosions ( silently but extremely deadly for sure)! What's sad is I'm in as much shock about it as the person who gets a whiff of it too because he doesn't warn me��!
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading Tiffany! xoxo
DeleteCan't wait to read more!!
ReplyDelete